Making the Most of the Material
by Cleo the Muse
Summary: SG1 plus one ponders the joys of airline security, eating at a factory and going to the mall. Pure, harmless fun except to a certain pair of glasses.


**Making the Most of the Material  
**by Cleo the Muse  
Rating: Older Kids  
Genre: General, Humor, Missing Scene/Epilogue  
Warnings: A few 'questionable' phrases (think "cover of Cosmopolitan magazine").  
Episodes: Set just before "200", with brief mention of Daniel's being in England during "Uninvited" and in Camelot during "Insiders". Pretty much spoiler-free.  
Synopsis: SG-1 (plus one) ponders the joys of airline security, eating at a "factory" and going to the mall. Pure, harmless fun (except to a certain pair of glasses).  
Notes: Inspired by Daniel's new glasses in "200" and new clothes in "Memento Mori". Hugs to all the folks at the D/V forum! (ducks ensuing shippy squees)  
Status: Completed as of August 19, 2006

* * *

**Making the Most of the Material**

"_Every good painter invents a new way of painting_."  
-- Aldous Huxley _Collected Essays_

"Remind me again why we agreed to let her come with us?"

Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter of the United States Air Force turned to look at her friend and teammate, Cameron Mitchell (ditto on the other stuff), then followed his gaze. In a chair next to a large window, Vala Mal Doran restlessly shifted in her seat, uncrossing her legs and re-crossing them the opposite way while flipping distractedly through some sort of magazine Teal'c had bought her. She was in constant motion, fingers toying with one of her pigtails, feet tapping the floor, flipping the magazine over to check her watch, or flicking glances up at the arrivals and departures display in the waiting area of the airport terminal.

"She missed Daniel," Sam explained. "Besides, we promised him we'd keep an eye on her while he was gone, so it's not like we could have just left her at the base while the three of us came to the airport without her."

"Nor would she have been pleased to have been left behind," added Teal'c, approaching the two colonels with a tray of soft drinks.

"Actually, I think she's done pretty well so far," Sam admitted. "Uh, other than the little _incident _with at the shoe-shiner's stand, that is."

Said incident occurred when the restless alien walked up to the shoe-shiner's platform while he was buffing a pair of oxfords and innocently asked the man if shoes were the _only_ thing he polished while he was down there. The pinch-faced businessman sitting on the raised chair wasn't pleased at all, and it was all Cameron and Sam could do to calm him down. Fortunately, Teal'c had returned from his foray to procure magazines for himself and Vala and used his not-inconsiderable powers of intimidation to convince the businessman to take his newspaper and leave. By that time, the shoe-shiner had packed up his box and disappeared.

"I mean, she hasn't asked a whole bunch of questions, hasn't bugged any of the other people waiting for their flights to arrive, and has kept her hands to herself," she continued. "She has _actually_ sat there with that magazine for five whole minutes."

"What kind of magazine is it, anyway?" Cameron asked. "Tabloid? Fashion?"

"Please say it's not _Cosmo_," Sam begged, shuddering at the thought of Vala reading articles like "101 Ways to Make Him Beg" and "Under Covers Cop: Top 10 Games to Play in Bed". The former host was already knowledgeable enough in those fields, thank you very much!

"It is not _Cosmopolitan_," Teal'c replied. "She did, however, inquire about going shopping for clothes when Danieljackson returned, so I procured the latest edition of _Vogue_."

Sam breathed a sigh or relief. Just then, the barely-intelligible PA announced the arrival of Daniel's flight from Heathrow Airport in England via Chicago O'Hare. Vala rolled the magazine in half and tucked one end into the top of the small purse she carried, while simultaneously leaping to her feet and running over to Sam, Cameron, and Teal'c. "That's his flight!" she exclaimed.

"And that's his plane," Cameron replied, pointing out the window at the gleaming 747 taxiing toward the terminal.

"Well, let's go down there and greet him when he gets off the plane, then!"

"Uh, we can't do that. We have to wait for him here."

Her eyebrows rose. "I see it in the movies all the time."

"Maybe movies from more than ten years ago," Cameron corrected. "Airport security won't let us go down to the actual gate itself, we have to wait here."

"But we all have _very _high security clearance, don't we? I mean, since we all work at the--"

"--mountain, yes. But that's a _military_ security clearance. This is different."

"Oh," she pouted, turning to the window only to discover the plane was no longer in sight. "Different how?"

Mitchell rolled his eyes. "Sheesh! Just--aw! It's just different, okay? Airport security has _nothing_ to do with national security--er, I mean, well it _does_, but... it's not the same as what we do, got it?" He scowled at the grin from Sam and smirk from Teal'c. "You two explain it better, then."

"Utilizing our security clearance to bypass a civilian safety measure would be an inappropriate use of the privileges we have been granted by this government," Teal'c stated.

"Oh, well then I guess we'd better wait here, hadn't we?" she replied, edging toward the concourse corridor and stopping at the rope barrier. Sam flashed Teal'c a smile before following the younger woman.

"You_ do_ have a way with words," Cameron muttered.

"Indeed."

"Where is he?" Vala sighed a few minutes later, bouncing up and down a little as she craned her neck past the security guard standing at the opening in the barrier.

"Well, his flight was in the first class seating, so he'll be one of the first to get off the plane," Sam began. "Still, the concourse is pretty far, even if you take one of the motor carts."

"There he is!" the alien exclaimed, standing on her toes and waving excitedly. Sure enough, several yards down the corridor was the tall, bespectacled archaeologist, lugging a carry-on doubtlessly containing a laptop and enough books and research materials to start a small library. Spotting his team (plus one), he casually waved back, then used that hand to push the bridge of his glasses back up where it belonged.

As soon as he cleared the barrier, Vala launched herself at him. Startled, Daniel dropped the carry-on bag, raising both arms to either catch her or ward her off, and ended up having one of his hands deflect off her shoulder and knock his glasses off his face.

"Mommy!" yelled a cute little kid, racing to greet the woman immediately behind Daniel.

_Crunch_.

"Whoops," gulped Vala, peering around Daniel's shoulder at the crushed eyewear.

"Oh, I'm so sorry about that!" the woman apologized, shifting the squirming kid to her right hip.

"It's okay," Daniel answered, removing Vala's arms from his waist with a sigh and picking up the twisted frames and the lens that had popped loose. "One of the earpieces was broken already, they kept sliding off." He smiled for the woman's benefit. "They were gonna have to be replaced, anyhow."

Sam wondered if he still had any idea what that smile did to women, as the child's mother practically melted. Fortunately, the husband caught up to the kid just at that moment and provided a convenient distraction.

"Sorry about that," Vala echoed.

"I wasn't kidding," he re-iterated. "The left hinge came loose while I was at Ca... uh, the old library. Ramus and Valencia got a little carried away with their sword practice and accidentally walloped me a good one."

"Ouch," Cameron grinned. "Looks like we're making a stop at the mall before we eat, aren't we?"

"Well, I normally get my glasses from the optometrist's office in Colorado Springs," Daniel explained. "I guess I could wait until Monday, but that means--"

"We can get him to phone your prescription in to the place here, can't we?" Sam asked.

"And you've already put _that_ guy's kids through college, so why not share the wealth a little?" Cameron joked.

"Ha," Daniel answered, but he was already digging into the pocket of his denim jacket for his cell phone. "Which mall?"

"Tabor's only a block away from the restaurant," the younger man replied. "How 'bout there?"

"We will be dining at the Old Spaghetti Factory," Teal'c intoned, easily lifting the carry-on.

Vala blinked. "You can dine at a factory?"

"Tabor doesn't have an optician," Daniel muttered, stepping out of the way of the traffic coming from the concourse so he could speak to the person at his optometrist's office.

"It's not actually a factory, Vala, that's just what they call it," Sam explained.

"Cherry Creek... it's on the way! Sorta... well, maybe if you take the long way around," Cameron amended. "Actually, it's easier if we just _pass_ the restaurant, then go back. Pretty sure they have an optometrist, though."

"So instead of parts or machinery they manufacture foods?" Vala questioned.

"Not exactly."

"Optician," corrected Teal'c. "An optometrist examines the eyes; however it is the optician who produces eyewear."

"Even though it's ordered there, that's not where they make it?" chorused Cameron and Vala.

Daniel coughed. "What?"

"Glasses," answered Cameron.

"Food," Vala replied. "We were talking about the manufacture of food at this... spaghetti factory."

The archaeologist's eyebrows shifted positions rapidly as his expression changed from confusion to surprise and settled on understanding. "Oh, uh... well, at this time of day, it'll probably take about an hour to get to the mall. Let's get moving, shall we?"

By the time they reached the baggage carousel, the crowd had dispersed a little from the conveyer, and Cameron was able to quickly grab Daniel's duffel. "Let's go!" he announced.

Piling into Teal'c's Durango, the team (plus one) made it to the shopping mall in just a little over half an hour. Despite Daniel's obvious fatigue from the thirteen-hour flight, Sam could tell he'd rested a little during the lay-over in Chicago. Good thing, too, since Vala immediately began tugging on his arm when they walked inside the Lord & Taylor, excited about exploring the clothing stores.

"Optician first," Daniel declared, ignoring the sulky pout his pronouncement immediately produced. "And it'll take about an hour to make my glasses, so I _guess_ we can do a little shopping while we wait."

"Well, what are we waiting for?" she declared, marching in the direction of the women's clothing section. Daniel caught her by the shoulders and turned her toward the mall, instead. For a former system lord who had ostensibly had every luxury at her disposal, Vala was easily impressed by the enormous variety of clothing, jewelry, and accessories on display. Fortunately, the escalator to the second floor was not far and the one-hour optical was just outside the department store.

"The good news is, we got your prescription, Mr. Jackson," began one of the two lab-coated young women behind the counter, eyeing the team (plus one) curiously. "The bad news is, we don't carry the model of frames your optometrist said you normally order."

"Maybe we can find something close enough to it," Sam suggested.

Daniel sighed and turned toward the racks of frames lining the walls.

"Hey, Jackson, look at these!" Cameron exclaimed, and the whole team (plus one) turned to see the younger man trying on a pair of glasses that looked like the ones from the Old Navy commercials. Sam grinned, plucking up the nearest pair of horn-rimmed "Buddy Holly" frames and dropping them on her own face. Hilarity ensued when Teal'c found a pair of hot-pink octagonal "granny" glasses, complete with chain. Even the girls behind the counter were gasping for breath.

While Daniel tried on pair after pair, still not satisfied with the look or fit of any of them, the rest of his team amused themselves by trying on different frames, reading the eye charts, and playing with the display of multi-colored lenses.

"Try these, Daniel," Vala suggested suddenly.

"They're not much like my normal glasses," he replied.

"I know. I think you should try them, though," she insisted.

Skepticism etching his features, Daniel accepted the frames, slipping them behind his ears. "A lot _smaller_ than my normal ones."

Sam swallowed hard. "Oh, I think you should get those."

"Definitely," Cameron added.

"Indeed."

"Really?"

"Absolutely," Vala confirmed.

"Yeah," one of the girls behind the counter agreed while the other nodded, her eyes wide. "Uh, just the one pair, Mr. Jackson, or do you need sunglasses, too?"

"How many of these do you have in-stock?" the archaeologist asked, handing her the frames and not bothering to correct his title.

She blinked, then checked the serial number in the computer. "Five."

"I'll take 'em," he answered. "Uh, I'm pretty accident-prone, and so are a few others." He shot a glance at Vala.

"What?" she exclaimed in innocent protest. "I've broken only _two_ pairs of your glasses, and you said yourself this last pair was broken already."

Daniel cleared his throat and turned back to the waiting girls. "That'll be five pairs. And I don't need insurance or anything on any of 'em, 'cause they're just gonna get broken anyway. Can you have all five ready in an hour?"

"Uh, yeah," the girl gulped.

"Now, let's go _shopping!_" Vala grinned as they stepped out of the store into the mall itself.

Well over an hour and several hundred dollars worth of clothing and accessories later, Sam decided it was a _very_ good thing Daniel was a GS-15 with combat pay. Not all the items in the many bags the team (plus one) carried were for Vala, though, as each had found a few items of interest. The alien woman had managed to cajole Daniel into buying a number of things for himself, too. When they finally made it back to the optician, Sam's stomach was growling and Teal'c had already made a comment about "consuming an equine". Daniel quickly paid for his eyewear and dropped the remaining encased frames into one of the many bags of clothes.

Vala's choice in clothing for herself was sometimes questionable, but when Daniel turned around with his new glasses in place, Sam had to admit that the alien's tastes were _excellent_ when it came to Daniel.

_Uh, no pun intended_, she blushed, grateful she hadn't said that aloud. She smiled at the younger woman, then, and gave her an approving nod.

Vala sidled up next to Sam as the team (still plus one) left the mall and headed back toward Teal'c's SUV. "Must be the material I have to work with," she whispered conspiratorially.

* * *

Author's Notes: 

Firstly, I'd like to thank the lovely (if not excessively silly) ladies at the D/V forum for inadvertently supplying the plot bunny for this 'fic. Secondly, I'd like to thank Michael Shanks for wanting to update Daniel's look. 'Nuff said.


End file.
